A client asked me this question yesterday.
The definition of Motivation in Webster’s Dictionary; Motive – the sense of need, desire and fear. Based upon this definition, some sources of motivation can be dysfunctional and that is why it can be so illusive.
Do you want to be motivated by need, desire and fear or your values? Values are the only form of functional inspiration, versus motivation. Values are something that naturally pulls you forward without a lot of effort.
Inspiration fulfills you from the inside out versus motivation tries to fulfill you from the outside in. It is impossible to be fulfilled from the outside in and this is why you can feel empty even though you appear to have reached a goal.
Most people, without being aware of it, are motivated from the outside in.
You hear it all the time, I’ll be happy when I; get a raise, make more money, have more time, fall in love, get a new car, go on a holiday, etc –
And then your dysfunctional part of your ego mind says “is this all there is?”
So let’s go way back in time –
To that fateful day – come on, you remember that day when you were just waking up from that lucid sleep and you were thinking – what am I going to do today?
And then bang! Then it hits you! Holy shit! I quit my perfectly good job that my mother told me to keep and became an entrepreneur and started my own business! And you started the first day of the many days of the rest of your life waking up unemployed without a guaranteed pay check. You didn’t feel that safe did you?
So without really knowing it, instead of going out and adding 100% value to your clients, your dysfunctional part of your ego mind worked at getting the need of safety met through your clients. You have to go out and sell! You have to pay your mortgage and God help you if you don’t.
You ran after any prospect that could fog a mirror and as you approached each one your dysfunctional part of your ego mind was thinking “please buy my product!” Your dysfunctional part of your ego mind was thinking “I really need this sale because I really need to feel safe! Please save me! If I could get this one sale then I would feel good and feel worthy!”
And you recreated this pattern time and time again trying to get the need of safety met through your work and again, outside of yourself.
And to make matters worse, as soon as you reached a goal, which was linked to the need of safety which cannot be met from the outside, your dysfunctional part of your ego mind said “is this all there is”!
And this continuing pattern of emotional highs and lows is what contributed to your probable adrenaline addiction also.
So why do you loose your motivation when you get $100,000 in the bank?
One reason is your dysfunctional part of your ego mind says “is this all there is?” And while you thought that money would bring you a certain level of fulfillment it didn’t and this is because money doesn’t bring fulfillment which can’t be met through outside motivation because it is dysfunctionally based to begin with and likely linked to the need of safety.
Another reason is the need of safety which your dysfunctional part of your ego mind has been trying to meet from the outside in is still not met.
And one is now addicted to the new need of adrenaline.
So the pattern of “is this all there is” will repeat itself. While you are asking this question the motivation will go away and so will the money earning until the bank account goes down and you create another fateful day – And then bang! Then it hits you! Holy shit! I quit my perfectly good job and I have to go out and sell!
🙂 And then your dysfunctional part of your ego mind thinks -“That’s OK, at least I’m motivated!”
What is the answer?
Get your emotional needs identified and met and not through your clients and your business.
Inspire yourself through your values, vision, purpose and mission for long lasting fulfillment which is based upon service to others.
Then your dysfunctional part of your ego mind will not be saying “is this all there is?”